until tomorrow

One day I'm content.
The  next I'm restless.

The next I'm complete in Him.
The next I've completely forgotten.

And it all revolves around this relationship that isn't arriving.

And yet I know that the lowercase "he" will never satisfy.

Until the uppercase "He" is the one I love

with my whole heart
with all my emotion
with my soul
and entire being
and mind
and strength
and tears

Until then

Even

the most romantic moment
the most lovely date
the sweetest kiss
the tightest handhold
the deepest secrets told
the kindest love.

None.

None will satisfy like Jesus.

So I'll write these words today.

And pray that I can write them again tomorrow.

And on the tomorrow after, when I will forget

I'll read them again.

Jesus.

Oh sweet Jesus.

Hold me tighter than I hold anything

Shine brighter to me than any ring I desire.

Last longer than any kiss that will come.

Be who you already are.

Because in You, oh my King Jesus,

in you

I live.

But when tomorrow forgets

Remind me.

1. I'm not depressed. If you read this and heard that word in the tone, you're vastly wrong. I'm joyous in the Jesus who IS ENOUGH. 

2. I read an article on Desiring God on how the church should treat singles and I tweeted it (twice actually), put it out on facebook, and I'm telling you now - GO READ IT! NOW. Here is the link. Seriously. And then put it into action. If you're a single - put it into action. If you're married - put it into action.  I truly believe that if the church lived this out, singles would act vastly different, marriage would be viewed differently (aka maybe it wouldn't be glorified like it is salvation), and maybe, just maybe, hearts would come to know JESUS for who HE is - the ONE who satisfies.

Some of my favourite lines: 

"Conversely, unmarried men and women are not the church’s workhorses. As a new believer, I was in big demand as a new babysitting resource in the church." 

". . .we single adults need loving challenges when we have allowed a root of bitterness to spring up and block our prayers to God, our fellowship with others, and our service to the church. Deferred hopes cannot be allowed to corrode our thankfulness for the gift of salvation." 

"Through the years, I've observed that The Singles can be a prickly lot to pastor. Whatever leaders say from the pulpit about singleness is guaranteed to encourage some and offend more. I know because I’ve been in both camps, depending on where I am in the cycle of hope or despair and how I am working that out in my soul before God."

I love that line of depending on where in the cyle of hope or dispair - my heart so understands that cycle - hence this post today

3. If you're here. Comment. I see the numbers. I know you've made it this far. It's easy to live life and be lonely. To read things and not comment. But HONESTLY, silence builds nothing. Words build community. You are WELCOME here.

4. That's all.

walking in nature

My friend April and I went for a walk through the trails by my parent's house. My parents live in a great townhouse that happens to sit right on a pond (click here for the link to those photos - pretty pretty?) that also connects to a bunch of trails. It was a fairly muddy day so a lot of my pictures didn't turn out because mud actually isn't very pretty..

We talked through our joys, our struggles, and then laid everything down before our God.
It was good.

Also, speaking of good hair (what), do you see how gross my hair looks in that photo? That is called my washed it, then used product to make it wavy/curly, it looked good for two days, and this is day three, and a shower SHOULD have happened before the walk. I promise I washed it soon after getting home - either that or I put a tuque on.

AND speaking of good friends, April fits in that category. She constantly inspires me to choose joy before any other emotion. She encourages me to give everything to Jesus because He is in control. She reminds me of truth because she lives it out each day. She's a keeper. And you should pray for her Mom okay --> Meet Virginia

{a walk through} psalm 2

Starting January 2013, I decided to take a little step into a semi big blog commitment. I'm going to walk through the Psalms on my blog. Until the book is done, I'll post a verse or two in a photo every single Tuesday and Thursday. The heart of this series is for me to be looking into the word and being intentional to post HIS words here. Sometimes it'll just be the one photo as a blog post, sometimes I'll share what the words in the verse meant to me as I read it, and sometimes I'll have a post going on that day that speaks of other things. Thanks for joining me in this Psalm walk through.

You are my Son;
today I have begotten you.

You are mine.

You are my child.

My first born son.

My biological child.





As women it's easy to get caught up in all the "son" and "men" talk in the Bible.
And I've seen lots of girls get in a frenzy because it doesn't seem fair.

I've found such comfort in knowing that in the culture that this was written in, a son was looked at differently. Culturally, the first born son meant so much.

So to be called a first born son of God is what I want to be called.

I want to be the heir.

And through the life and death and resurrection of Jesus, I am an heir.

Wow.
Wow.
WOW!

  

that heart-y thing

The process from idea to formation for this blog design took some time but I always knew that the heart-y thing was going to be a part of the design.

The first time I saw the heart thing was in a sketchy little bar in Seattle. My friends and I had driven down to see a show. The reason my friends went was for the headliner but I went because a little-known singer named Lights was opening. I met her that night and she still remains one of my favourite artists.

I included two versions of this photo because I wanted to share how I used to edit photos back when I was a little baby. It's amazing what 4 years can do to a girl's editing style.

AND I'm pretty sure I didn't think people would notice that I had edited yet. Yeah . . . cool.

Anyways, back to the heart thing!

So. At some point in the show I went into the bathroom and low and behold I saw the heart thing drawn on the bathroom stall.

I wish I had an original photo but alas . . . 4 years ago is a long time.

I saw the heart thing and just fell in love with it. I decided to get a tattoo of it.

I told my brother and he told me to wait a year. If I still wanted it in a year, then it was a great idea to get as a tattoo.

well it's been 4 years and still no tattoo, but not for lack of desire. I just can't decide if I want it on my foot or wrist - thoughts?

I drew it when I went home.

And I draw it all the time.

On napkins.
In my Bible.
On my sermon notes.
On my feet.
In cards.
everywhere

So when the designer asked me what I wanted in a design, I sent her these photos.

Isn't it wonderful that her writing (design style) is far better than mine?

The heart thing means so much to me.

The meaning has changed throughout different seasons but the heart of it (pun intended) sticks with me.

It means to love fully.
Without fear.

It's based on several verses.

Matthew 14:14 - where Jesus heals a crowd of sick people despite having just withdrawn to have some space -->  love without ceasing

Proverbs 3:3 - which talks about not letting love and faithfulness leave --> love always. remain loving always.

It points in several directions.

It's a love that looks different than the traditional cultural version of love.

A love that forgives, loves, hopes, seeks peace, and points to the only One who is capable of true love: Jesus.

And that's why I blog.

To share His love.

{a walk through} psalm 1

HAPPY NEW YEAR! (Or New Years, or New Year's --> all depending on how you prefer your reading)

Welcome to {a walk through the book of Psalms}.

Near the beginning of December, I started praying about starting something intentional for the new year. I wasn't quite sure what it would be until I thought about walking through different books of the Bible and sharing the words here. 

As I started looking at the book, I thought about how I would make a series that was sharing the Bible readable and shareable and I realized that it would be cool to just share a portion of each chapter and to put the verses on photos.

I've really been enjoying becoming dear friends with pixlr and this way it'll challenge me to get better at design while challenging me to get into the Word consistently each week.

I'm not sure how this will look long-term. It kinda freaks me out to say that I'm committing to the entire book and yet it's good for me to do that as well.

So. Welcome to this new series.

Over the next year (and a bit) I'll be sharing two chapters per week, one on Tuesday and one on Thursday. Some days will just have the photo whereas others will have what the verse made me think about, or pointed me to, and then other weeks might also contain a blog post that has nothing to do with the series. I don't want to promise much because I'll certainly fail at anything spectacular, but I want to commit to keep sharing scripture here.

So here goes. Here's the first one!

As I've mentioned a few times lately, I'm in a season of waiting for God to provide. I've applied for close to a hundred jobs, interviewed for over ten jobs, and I'm praying daily to HIS provision.

Lately I certainly feel like I'm withering.

But just like I sang these words right after I wrote them

would I weather a different storm
or would I wither from the scorn



(my youtube account has been acting funny. If for some reason this video is showing a different one that the song "Wither", please utilize this link)

I don't want to wither.
Ever.
I want to stand firm wherever HE places me.

I don't know the future.
But I know where my roots lie - deep in Jesus.