Sometimes I wonder if other people react like I react?
I was just reading a post Jamie wrote about a wedding she was just a part of. As I read it, I stopped and just envisioned the future God has for my life and yep, I've got tears rolling down my cheeks.
I always wonder if this is normal.
What do I expect from God?
Last night I laid expectations before Him, and I left them there.
At least until I pick them up again.
We'll see how long that lasts.
I feel like God's really been challenging me lately with statements like:
do you love Me more than this?
will you remain faithful even if these desires of your heart aren't answered the way you desire?
what is more important to you? Me or the things you claim aren't happening?
do you love Me more than this?
When they had finished breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon, son of John, do you love me more than these?” He said to him, “Yes, Lord; you know that I love you.” He said to him, “Feed my lambs.” He said to him a second time, “Simon, son of John, do you love me?” He said to him, “Yes, Lord; you know that I love you.” He said to him, “Tend my sheep.” He said to him the third time, “Simon, son of John, do you love me?” Peter was grieved because he said to him the third time, “Do you love me?” and he said to him, “Lord, you know everything; you know that I love you.” Jesus said to him, “Feed my sheep. . . . And after saying this he said to him, “Follow me.”
(John 21:15-17, 19b ESV)
I'm grateful for a mentor who answers texts even late on a Sunday night and shares truth and understanding.
I'm grateful for a sister who claims to have five years of journals filled with the same prayers I pray. I'm even grateful for my brother-in-law who kindly offered the comfort that he is thankful he didn't get married until when he did. Oh thanks Mac. I am thankful for all of these.
I'm thankful for a God who just keeps wrapping His arms around me as I cry. Who gently leads me to the floor where I kneel at His throne. A God who sent His son and so can understand the ache of not being with the one you love. A Jesus who suffered all scorn for my sake and who can therefore offer more comfort than I even need. It's at the foot of His cross that I suddenly gain the peace I yearn for. A Holy Spirit that weaves truth into my heart when I desperately want to lean into the lies that the devil shares. He reminds me that I am His.
Because I am His.
And I desire to live for Him more than anything else.
